For some odd reason, later this evening, I began to feel very melancholy about certain things. I found out that yet another neighbor had something stolen from his porch back in January, and it really made me dwell on how much I want a new house. I want a huge yard again, like our old house, and I want to feel safe that someone won't be sneaking up to my door to steal my belongings. I don't have the energy to focus on it right now, but somehow my mind wants to. For some reason, it is making me miss living outside of the city limits/in the country.
I also found myself missing my girls too much, even though the break is so needed right now during winter. Phillip and I went to Fuji and had a fun date, so why I'm focused on one evening wihtout them in a negative way is beyond me.
I think I am just overwhelmed this evening with how bad the economy is, how much I want a new house, how if I did decide to go back to work next year, all of the jobs that I see are offering like $9/hour, which is just ridiculous. That won't even pay me to work after I pay daycare and expenses for clothes, lunches and gas. I am just very blah at the moment, and I can't sleep.
Here's to hoping that I wake up tomorrow without these clouds hanging over me. I need to focus on the way that I am blessed to be able to stay at home with my children, how I have a decent house, a good car and a healthly family...but man, that is hard to do at this exact instant.
I just feel trapped by this terrible economy. Granted, there are some phenomenal deals on houses right now. (If you're in the market, tons of houses in town in good neighborhoods are under $200k for 2300 to 3000 square feet and decent sized back yards.)