Miles: Momma, I need some popsicles sticks, some cups and some tape.
Me: Umm. OK. What for?
Miles: Mooooommmma, I got to do art about when Jesus was in da cave. The people put Jesus in the cave and put the rock over it. And I am gonna do that with the cup, the popsicle stick and the tape.
Miles: Momma, when I'm really, really old, like 100, like you, I'm gonna be a momma and Lola's gonna be a momma and there'll be three momma's in our family. But only one Daddy.
Me: Ahhhhm. No. Don't tell people that. When you grow up, you will get married and have your own husband.
Miles: Oh. (Disappointed)
I walk into the bathroom to catch Miles trying to plunge an almost-overflowing toilet.
Me: What in the world are you doing?
Miles: I'm plungin' it, Momma. It's too full of water!! OH NO!! It's gonna overflowwwww!
Me: What did you put in there?!?!
Miles: Ahhhm. Just tee tee and tissue. (long pause) And some poo poo.
I am trying to rest on the couch at 8 AM after fixing breakfast for Miles and Lola.
Miles is standing next to my head, grunting as she does sideways leg lifts to intentionally try to keep me from resting.
Me: Miles. Stop. It. Now. I am tired. I am trying to rest for just a minute. Stop it. NOW.
Miles: But Mooooomma, I'm praticin'g my exa-cises for kindergarten, Momma.