The saga of Jolene and my boots and the reason for my blog's name

OK, so here is the story behind my headline about Jolene not havin' nothin' on my boots...
OK, Here it goes: 1.)Jolene is Jolene from the song. She steals other womens' men. 2.)The boots story is in regards to these boots that I had that were really high heeled and were 'snake skin' and I called them my stripper boots just because of the height. One night I went to dinner to celebrate a friend's new job. There was this girl there named Rachel. She wasn't the most naturally attractive girl you ever met (that's for sure) but that's irrelevant (not really). We were part of a group and she got kinda of smarty when I asked if she knew my best friend who is from the same tiny town but claimed not to know my friend so I just dropped it. Later, we were suppossed to meet everyone downtown. Meredith (girl with the new job) got a call while we were sitting there wondering where they were. The girl said, and I really do quote, "I don't like that girl Dusty OR her boots so I am not coming." Then a year later, I was at a bday party. I went to the restroom with a friend; there was an empty spot at the table next to me. When we came out, she had sat down. She took one look at me and snatched up her belongings and huffed down to the other end of the table. THEREFORE...it has been a huge joke for a long time bc she was just psycho and hated me immediately bc people were complimenting my clothes and boots and she was homely. 3.) Girls like my husband; they like him in a forget he's taken kind of way. There have been a whole bunch of times when we have been out at night and some girl from college or his work or something will see us and be all drunk and basically forget that-HELLO- he is married and I am sitting RIGHT THERE. I actually had this chic named Amy lean down between the two of us one night at this bar Wall Street when we still just engaged and she turned sideways while leaned over, back to me, tits to him and straight up made him so uncomfortable that he mentioned like three times that I was his fiancee. This has happened a bunch of times. It is weird. It is oddly common that some drunk girl makes an idiot out of herself by flirting and such with my husband. 4.)THEREFORE...Jolene ain't got nothin' on me and my boots...BC those girls think they are a bunch of Jolene's but they aren't...cause I am the one with the snake skin stripper boots. LOL. Oh, AND I am the one with Funkmaster P...Phillip. LOL.